Dear Mom, I get it now

Dear Mom, I get it now. 

I understand the frustration when i didn't want to eat my dinner because i "didn't like it". I didn't understand then, i just knew you were making me eat this green vegetable that didn't taste good. I didn't understand how exhausted you were. How you worked for 8 hours that day then still spent an hour in the kitchen trying to make us a meal. 

I understand the sadness you felt on Christmas day watching us open all 10 of our gifts only to open the one or two you got. I was a little girl, blinded by the excitement of my new toys. Now i know although you were grateful for your gifts, you wished for more. 

I never understood how happy you got when my step dad would bring you roses or i brought you a bowl of cereal in the morning. To me they were just flowers and simple cereal. Being a working mom, a cook, a maid and everything in between and never really getting appreciated for any of it sucks. Now i get why in those rare moments of appreciation your face lit up with joy. In those rare moments someone put YOU first ? It made your day. 

You wanted to last slice of cake even though you said you didn't because you wanted me to have it. 

You needed those extra 30 mins of sleep in the morning

You yelled at me when i forgot to take the meat out of the freezer because defrosting it yourself is just one more thing you have to do today . (as if you didn't do enough that day already) 

You saw right through my fake friends even though i wanted to believe they were real. 

I never understood why you got so pissed when i forgot to pick up my clothes off the floor. "they are just clothes, shes always mad" i would think. Day after day you pick up after everyone including yourself because if you didn't ? No one would. So to turn around and see dirty clothes on the floor was like a slap in the face.

You got angry when i was ungrateful 

You wanted a mother days gift 

You wanted a Thank you

You needed that trip to Target alone 

I didn't understand then and i'm sorry, i don't think any of us did but now that we are mothers ourselves ? 

We get it now